Grief and Rest Ritual

To let grief move at its own pace, with company and structure rather than pressure.

Any time. Especially in the dark days before the New Moon.

MoonMagicx Lunar Method™ phase: Waning Crescent.

• A white candle

• Apache Tears, Rhodonite or Cypress

• A photograph or object

• A blanket

• Water

Clear the evening. This ritual has no productive outcome, and that is the point.

Sit low — floor, cushion, bed. Candle and object in front, blanket around you.

Light the candle. Say: 'I am not rushing this.'

1. Say aloud who or what you are grieving.

2. Say one thing you loved and one thing that was hard. Both are allowed.

3. Sit with the feeling for ten minutes without fixing it. Cry if it comes; do not perform it if it does not.

4. Drink the water slowly.

5. Write one sentence to them, or to yourself.

6. Wrap up and rest, or sleep, immediately afterwards.

'I loved, and it cost me.

I do not have to be finished to be all right.

I let this move at the pace it needs.'

Snuff the candle. Say: 'Held.'

Eat something. Message one person, even briefly. Grief work should end in contact, not isolation.

Rushing yourself through loss to be easier company is the most common shadow here.

• What do I miss that I have not said out loud?

• What am I angry about that feels disloyal to admit?

• What would gentleness look like tonight?

If grief becomes unbearable or you feel unsafe, contact a doctor, a crisis line or someone you trust. Ritual is company, not treatment.